What Happened To Literature?
I was in a small book shop in Wood Green, London, the other day and as I was perusing the books when I noticed something a bit odd: a book titled Alice in Zombieland. I was overcome with bemusement, annoyance, and an unhealthy urge to rip the book to shred so that no soul shall ever have to bear the weight of reading this. But it got me thinking. For several years now there have been some ‘shockingly’ silly pieces of literature that have surfaced. Stuff that ought to be floating on the internet as some piece of pathetic fan fiction; yet it’s mass produced and somehow making money!? I mean what happened to literature? So here we go. I’m going to list a few books of recent years that I find completely and totally redundant and for no reason whatsoever feel that they should exists.
Sherlock Holmes is a homosexual in this X rated retelling of Doyle’s classic A Study in Scarlet by Sarah Masters. The only thing Sarah is a master of is not having an original thought. Really, must she do this with Holmes? Can she not write an original story of her own or does she just want to toss in kinky sex scene in between Holmes and Watson moving in at 221b and learning what Rache means. She’s also doing this with Pride and Prejudice. Feels a bit lazy and redundant.
“Dead men tell no tales”. Can I just say ‘booo’. We’re pretty much looking at a toned down Davy Jones from Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest. Again, why? Why is this needed? It’s really not. The original story is dull enough without sea monster mucking it up. I mean what’s next Nazis in space…oh wait!
Vampire this, vampire that. I’ve skimmed this book and even saw the film. Don’t ask me why. I was bored. However, out of all these weird mashups and retellings this appears to be the only one that is only ever so slightly ‘worth it’. Why? Because it’s fun to tinker with history a bit. And it’s an ‘original’ story in that someone didn’t just take someone elses story and go ‘INSERT CRAZY SEA MONSTER/ZOMBIE/SEX SCENE/WHATEVER HERE!’
Zombie. Maybe Seth Grahame-Smith felt bad for pointlessly adding zombies to this tale already horrific tale (if you can’t tell I already don’t like Jane Austin and don’t see how adding monsters will help her out) and that’s why he did Abe Lincoln Vampire Hunter.
First off, this looks strikingly similar to Tim Burton’s film which put me off because that really was a royal stinker. Then I read the title and wanted to throw the book into the fires of Mordor. Has the world has lost all originality? We just seem to jump between Vampires and Zombies and erotica nowadays. Why not have a Vampire-Zombie who is in love with a Zombie-Vampire..of the game gender?! Or even better, have none of it and do something original?!
There really is some stinky “literature” out there. Stuff that I don’t understand how it has a market. Personally I think I’m just going to write a love story featuring a dwarf and a leprechaun and see how well I do! So tell me people have you stumbled upon a ridiculous ‘mashup’ book or ‘retelling’ with an unnecessary slant? If so do share. I can’t be alone in thinking this is all pointless!
UPDATE:
I should like to add that I have no issue with parody writing. It can be quite fun and entertaining, which is why I point out that Abe Lincoln Vampire Hunter was the most enjoyable because it was better than these others. A mere insertion of monsters or sex doesn’t necessarily mean good or enjoyable parody. I simply look for good parody and found these, overall, to be quite redundant.
Ah, Luke. I can see where you come from. But be patient and tolerant. There have always been people with a lot of imagination and people with less of that. If you burn the less imaginative’s products – with what are they left? Packing books at Amazon? Cutting cattle-halfs apart and making salami? Let them dream and express themselves. Censorship always limits creativity. And after all – aren’t we using classic literature and turn it into something else, too?
Hugs
Annelie
February 16, 2013 at 8:20 pm
ha, I do know what you mean, and I agree. There most certainly is room for creativity, and I love creativity when it’s creative.
! I do love a good mashup like Estlman’s Sherlock Holmes meets Dracula and Sherlock Holmes meets Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. But they are good and well-written, these just…nah. ha 
I just think that most of this is fan-fiction and shouldn’t go beyond an internet forum.This is the horrific result of the Twilight generation in my opinion. Zombies, Vampires, erotica; they are so overdone that they are white noise nowadays. However, I don’t consider what we do to be using classic literature and turning it into something else. I consider us to be adding on and staying within bounds of what was previous started. 
February 16, 2013 at 8:42 pm
Well written or not, its in the eye of the beholder. Twilight was a bestseller, Shades of Grey, too. Are these well written books? Is great literature easy to understand for everyone? See what I mean?
February 16, 2013 at 9:03 pm
I do see your point, and think it’s totally fair. Not everyone will enjoy the same book. I’ve read/attempted to read most of these, and I read Twilight, and found that they lack substance. But these books, like ours, need to be open to scrutiny, and I’ve found these to be incredibly bad books. This doesn’t mean I’m apposed to a good parody story, because I am. But these, to me, aren’t good parodies.
February 17, 2013 at 7:57 am